Simple Holidays: Advent Activities

I don't know about you, but I have gone looking for lists of Christmas Countdown / Advent activities for the past couple of years, and have come up short.

Somehow, other people's ideas of "toddler-appropriate" activities are much more involved than I am willing to get.  It would be lovely to go on Christmas outings every night, or make elaborate treats with the kids, or sleep under the Christmas tree, but I'm a realist (pessimist?)  My kids would get way overstimulated, we don't have that kind of time on school nights, they'd make a huge mess and eat way too many cookies, and there's no flippin' WAY any of us would get any sleep in the living room on the floor surrounded by tempting ornaments and each other.

So after much researching and brainstorming, this is the list I have come up with of truly simple activities appropriate for small children.  A list compiled by an aspiring minimalist, whose kids operate best with a firm schedule and short activites.

1. Watch Charlie Brown Christmas
2. Put the angel (or other topper) on the Christmas tree
3. Set up the nativity scene
4. Put up __a decoration___ in your (kid's) room
5. Trip to Dairy Queen
6. Bake a treat (we made brownies from a mix.  Really.)
7. Make a paper chain
8. Papercraft: Construction paper Christmas tree with red dots (dot marker)
9. Wrap a gift (or several, depending on your patience.  I mean, your kids' patience?
10. Cocoa party
11. Read __insert favorite classic Christmas picture book here___
12. Go on a car ride to look at Christmas lights
13. Cinnamon dough Christmas ornaments
14. Decorate Christmas cookies (pre-made? Mix? Break and place dough?)
15. Christmas milkshakes (a milkshake with something mint in it)

That's it.  The other 9 days in my advent drawers are filled with candy.
We can't do an activity every single night!  Especially nights when we have church services or some other crazy busy situation going on.  Those nights the kids have a piece of candy and we go on our way.

How do you fill your Advent calendar or Christmas countdown?  Any truly easy traditions you keep with your littles?

Motherhood Masochism

This is going to get blunt.  It might not agree with you.  It might seem rude.
Such is my life.  Here we go, anyway.

I am getting very weary of motherhood masochism.
Complaining.
Whining.
Desperation.
Wine jokes.
Self-induced stress.
Lack of sleep.
Broadcasting troubles.
Negativity.
Pessimism.

Seriously.  Very tired of all of that.
I used to think it irritated me because I was on the outside of that world; I was a working mom.  Of course I was burning out and feeling awful, because I was in charge of 25+ children that were not my own for 10 hours a day, then coming home to my own.  What on earth were stay-at-home mothers complaining about?

But now I've been there.
I am in the middle of the trenches.  In year 2 of staying home full time, with two children (boys, no less) under the age of 3.
And it is even more annoying to me, now.

Motherhood masochism seems to be very prevalent across social media.  Women bemoaning their daily lives, their choices, their children.  To be completely honest, that's what it is - fishing for sympathy using negativity and cynicism about their children.
You chose to have these children.  You chose to be home with them.  You choose to spend each day the way you spend it.  Stop whining.

If that seems a little strong, consider how you would speak about your job if your children were listening.

If your kids are poorly behaved all day every day, it's up to you to teach them differently.
If your house is a mess, it's up to you to figure out a better chore schedule, cut down on possessions/clutter, or enlist help.
If you're tired, it's up to you to create routines that allow you to sleep enough at night.
If you haven't been out of the house in months, it's up to you to plan activities for your family where you get out and about.  Or to send a letter.  Or make a phone call.
If you feel unfulfilled/unchallenged, it is up to you to treat motherhood professionally and pour your gifts into it.
If you are not satisfied with your spouse's contributions, your physical appearance, your pet's training, your debt... it is up to you to discover new ways of doing things that improve your family's relationships, health, and comfort.

That is your job.
Your job is not to be a babysitter.  You are not just a warm body to be present in the house and hope emergencies don't arise.  You don't just churn out a few meals a day and occasionally scrub a toilet and try to keep children/creatures barely alive.  That is simply not enough.

My goal is not mom-shaming.
I believe in lots and lots of grace, many mistakes, plenty of flexibility.
Different approaches work for different families.
There is certainly a place for discussing your challenges with other moms, receiving emotional support, fresh ideas, and love.

My goal is that you realize that there is no place for martyrdom in this wonderful, intense, messy profession.  Anything that is dissatisfying is yours to fix.  You are the master of your domain, the mistress of your house, your own boss.  That means you can change anything! You can recreate whatever you need to!  You can innovate and experiment and research to your heart's content.

Perhaps the actual problem is that you have way too much on your plate. God does not call us to stand on the edge of sanity.  Simplify your life. Cut down activities, possessions, and schedules until you can do your job well.  Until you can serve your family wholeheartedly (most of the time) and proficiently (most of the time.)

Enjoy your glass of wine after the kids go to bed.  Just stop broadcasting on Facebook that you need it to survive your children.

Fall Wardrobe Inspiration

Ooh, fall clothes!
Fall/Winter clothes, really.

My favorite season. Honestly, I'm pretty inspired by a stack of scarves and a pair of riding boots.
But! This will eventually accompany a video about my wardrobe, so here we go.


Where I found this!

Let's be realistic- this sums up what I would wear on a daily basis. Black skinny pants, chambray shirt, brown riding boots, scarf, sweater, simple earrings, chunky watch.

 
Where I found this!                                           And this!
Since I bought some rain boots for myself, and I have a poncho-esque garment, this will probably make an appearance.  I don't carry a handbag, and that's definitely not a practical way to use an umbrella, but it's just an inspiration photo, right?  The second photo is less of a stretch, essentially just substituting my rain boots for riding boots in my normal outfits.

I wear a lot more pants in the fall and winter.  As in, in summer I keep out two pair of pants in my capsule and I occasionally wear one of them.  In winter, I have more like 5 pair of pants that I wear almost every day.  (I don't believe in leggings AS pants, but I love me a tunic and leggings.)


Where I found this

If I do wear a dress, it's probably like this, plus leggings.  I have never figured out in what climate it is appropriate to wear riding boots and a scarf with bare legs.  But I recently got a chambray dress (at Goodwill, for $1.99!) so this is going to be in heavy rotation.

So there we go!  Three major "lobes" to my fall/winter meal planning.  All designed for a mom who wear real clothes (no gym clothes here!) but are easily washable, appropriate for a Midwest fall/winter, and transitional from nursing to not.  (What?  Crewneck shirts? Where have you been for the last year of my life?)

Stay tuned for an accompanying video of my fall/winter capsule wardrobe!

Daily Routines

Let's be honest - "morning routines" were one of those things I thought were total hogwash.
A mystical creation of work-at-home moms who wanted to seem awesome on social media.
A farse.
Nobody really does this. Nobody actually does the exact same things every morning that include cleaning.  Nobody schedules their day like this.

Well...
I was wrong.

I don't think you must have a morning routine in order to be a professional mother. (And I do believe that being a stay-at-home mom is, in fact, a profession and should be treated as such.)  But I do think they can form naturally and be super helpful.


Before moving to our new home, I had neither a night nor morning routine.  I was basically flying by the seat of my mom pants, and I didn't know I had a problem.  Our new house is larger and requires more "housekeeping" to stay up to my standards, and my current baby is getting big and needing more specific schedules and attention, and my husband has gone back to full-time teaching at a permanent position, so my day has gotten fuller.  In a wonderful way, but fuller.
In order to fit everything in and still sleep a relatively healthy amount (I am not about motherhood masochism) I decided to do a few tasks before bed and in the morning before the kids get up, largely tasks I never did daily before.  And thus, a routine was born!

Some nights/mornings they don't get done.  I'm trying not to beat myself up about it when that happens, when sometimes I choose extra sleep or hanging out with my hubby or helping do some school work instead of tidying up my house.  It depends on the day's demands.  But it's nice to have slots to fit these activities into instead of constantly regretting that they're falling through the cracks.  It's good to know that these cleaning activities will get done almost daily, that my house most mornings will be clean and quiet, that if people drop by my home will be clean and inviting.   That I will be able to find everything I need if I need to rush out the door in the morning.

Stay tuned for full posts about my morning routine and night time routine!

Meal Planning, Differently

I cannot figure out how to meal plan traditionally
 I have read/watched lots of mom-bloggers and vloggers and many seem to plan out a week or more of meals, then hit up Costco or Sam's Club and buy all the things needed to have said meals.  Some do a wonderful job of stocking up on meat or staples on sale, and keeping multiple pantries or freezers full of things to use in future weeks.

Here is my struggle:

First off, I don't belong to any warehouse clubs.  I have never been able to justify the membership fees, or the drive to the nearest one (20 miles), nor do I have multiple pantries or a deep freezer.

Second, I have a rather poor selection of grocery stores near me (no Aldi or Trader Joe's or discount groceries!)

Third, I refuse to coupon.  I don't have the attention span/patience for that, and I don't subscribe to a physical newspaper.

So I spend an arm and a leg on groceries?
Nope.
I quite literally don't buy any food items that aren't on sale.

Essentially, I meal plan in reverse.

I get my weekly grocery store ads on Wednesday.  During nap time, I sit down and make a grocery list by seeking out the food we eat that is on sale or store coupon.  I am looking mostly for meat, produce, and dairy, as we don't really eat processed food. (Personal preference, we actually don't like the taste of most processed food.  We are not food snobs.  We eat a lot of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and M&Ms, okay?)
Neither store I have available requires me to actually cut out coupons, so I just take my ad to the store with me and they scan whatever coupons apply.  I do not clip coupons from anywhere.  If the store has a hanger-coupon-thingy by an item, great, I'll pull it off and take it with me to the checkout.

I make my list for each store, then I get out my list of dinners.  I compare the dinners list to the fresh foods on my shopping list, and decide 5 meals I can make to use the produce or meat that is on sale this week.
Then I plug them into my weekly planner based on amount of prep time, my husband's after-school schedule, and events going on.

That's it.
We shop on Saturdays, together as a family (free activity!) and my husband makes Saturday dinner (so I don't plan it.)  On Sunday, we tend to make a large meal like roast or a whole chicken, which we use as leftovers if we need more food for lunches or if we will be very busy one afternoon.  I usually have the freezer space to freeze half a roast if necessary.


Speaking of, we have leftovers for lunch.  Everybody, every day.
And we eat cold cereal, toast, or oatmeal for breakfast.

Done.

It's not fancy.  Sometimes it gets repetitious because of seasonal vegetables or dry spells in meat sales.  Some weeks we have precious little meat, or the same meat every night.
But that's okay!  We eat mostly whole foods, mostly healthy, and it gets done on a budget.  Goals accomplished.

Keep a lookout for my list of dinners!  I'll link it here when it's finished.
Also something about my planner.  Which might be my second-best friend in the world.

Souvenirs for Kids

...that aren't garbage.  Or toys.

When I was a kid, my dad traveled a few times a year for work.  He always brought back souvenirs for my sister and me, which was ridiculously exciting to my little hoarder self.  Postcards, t-shirts, stuffed animals, plastic travel mugs, tiny statue replicas... You name it, I had it.

I love what my dad was trying to do - generate a fun surprise for when he got home.  And it was wonderful!  

But the stuff.  

Oh my.

Going on a trip, and wanting to buy your children/grandchildren/nieces and nephews/nanny charges something? Great! Here's some suggestions on how to do that without clogging up their room with stuff.

Washcloths or towels.  Especially those kind that come all compressed into a little brick and then revive when you wet them.  It's super fun to make them grow, but then you have a very useful item left over.  Those washcloths are actually really soft and big!  Bonus: easy to fit in your suitcase!

These adorable washcloths are from Grandma and Grandpa's trip to Hawaii.  I don't know what "A Coconut Named Bob" is about, but it's SO CUTE an SOFT.  Big L enjoyed wetting them and watching them "grow."

A pen/pencil or eraser (for school aged children.). They can can use it at school and tell their friends about their cool relative who went cool places.  And it is consumable.  Rulers and folders are also good possibilities!

Candy/regional snacks.  Does your location have a particular packable food item that kids would like?  Saltwater taffy from the coast? Fudge from Michigan?  Maple sugar candies from Vermont or Canada?

1 T-shirt, 1 size too big.
Because they are already wearing their current size, so obviously mom and dad have dealt with their current wardrobe and they have enough clothes.  The shirt will get more wear if it is an intentional part of their next wardrobe.

A book.  Now, I am a softy for books - it is the one area of my home I have yet to purge.  That being said, a book about the cool place you went (at an appropriate reading level, of course) might be a perfect souvenir.

A useful item they can grow into.  For example, if your special child is almost ready for a water bottle, or a plate, or a baseball cap, or their own cocoa mug.  That way is not an extra of that item, but  it is the one the child uses daily because his/her parents know they already have one.

Any other great ideas for souvenirs for minimalist kids?  Leave them in a comment!  Happy travels.

Where the rubber meets the Road

So you have your plan, now how do you put it into place? For me it was a realization that no matter what plans I had in my head or on paper, the follow through was the toughest step. So here's what I did:

1) I started using cash. In a world where plastic is just as easy as cash to use, using cash may sound like an extra step to complicate things. It is limit setting though. I knew exactly how much money I have for food, gas, or personal items each month and have to think about the cash that is being handed over as I pay for each item. If I buy these things would I have enough  cash left for groceries before the next paycheck? How is my husband going to get to school or me to work if we drive to this event and needed more gas? Using cash helped me to see the limits that needed to be set in order to not overspend  and put more money on credit cards.

2) I started recording my spending. One would think that if I had a set amount of cash for various things I would no longer need to track where my money was going. Not true. It was even more important now that I track where my money was going. It gave me a record to look back on if I did overspend. It let me say, as much as I like this or that, it isn't a necessity so I can't buy it next month. It also helped me to set the amounts needed. It helped me realize that some of the amounts I had set in my budget were unrealistic. I either needed to find more money for a category, or I found that I didn't need as much money toward a category as I had originally set aside.

3) I found websites to help me. There are so many resources on the web, from alligning with you bank and credit card accounts to allowing you to manually enter your information for easier tracking.  My favorite website for this right now is everydollar.com. It is a Dave Ramsey established website which has a free and premium side. I currently use the free side of the website. It allows me to enter amounts into categories along with transactions so there is less math work on my end. I can go in and see how much is left in each category so I can double check my envelope amounts. The premium side of the website connects with various accounts so you can click and drag transactions to categorize them instead of entering them manually. There are other websites that do this such as mint.com. My advice, find one that works for you.

4) I haven't stopped learning. I'm still refining and tweaking my budget. I am constantly on the search for reading material or classes to learn more about money. How to save it, how to make it work for me instead of me working for it. I recently started tracking food prices. My grocery budget has been maxed out and I love finding ways to find even an extra dollar or two in the money allotted. Tracking prices though time consuming has shown me already that I really don't know the cheapest price that I'm able to get products at. Look for a future post on how to start if you are interested.

Any other ways you've found in helping rubber meet the road? Please leave a comment below.

Chores Your Toddler Can Do

A dual-post from both of us!

2-year-old (happens to be a boy)

• Wipe up spills. This was the first "chore" he learned.  We keep a kitchen towel hanging where he can reach it, and he takes care of his own spills, dog water dribbles, and wet shoe prints.

  

  About halfway through
  learning to set the table

• Set the table.  We didn't specifically teach this chore, we just started asking him to "put this on the table."  Gradually he picked up on where things "belong" and now does a pretty good job!
• Put away clean silverware.  It doesn't end up in the right compartments, but that is only because he's too short to reach/see.  He just takes it out of the dishwasher and puts it in the drawer as best he can.
• Sweep. We purchased this broom set when he showed interest in sweeping. He is best at sweeping into the dustpan, because it's a target to aim for instead of flinging dirt around the room.
• Feed pets.  Scooping stuff from a big container and pouring it into a smaller container? It's a toddler's dream job!  We only have a dog, but I'm sure this would work for cats. rodents, reptiles, etc.  Of course, make sure your toddler and pet are both safe during this process.  Some dogs get aggressive in regards to their food bowls, and some small pets could bite little fingers.  Also monitor how much your fish are fed.
• Throw away non-gross garbage.  He loves picking which garbage can to throw things in.
• Fetch needed items from another room.  Kleenex, diaper & wipes for himself or the baby, his own coat and shoes.
• Help with laundry.  Another favorite - he loves shaking out the clothes and towels and stuffing them into the dryer, or handing them to me to be folded.  He could also put them away in his drawers if I wasn't so into Konmari drawers.  (I let him put away his socks.)

  

  Stirring.  Or licking.
  Same thing, right?

• Help with baking/cooking. It's a mess, but it's a joy to behold.  Age-appropriate tasks include scooping and dumping, sprinkling spices or toppings, crushing crackers, and laying out bread slices/pepperonis/cupcake liners.  (We use those washable reusable liners - I imagine paper ones would be too difficult since they're difficult for me!) 
  
  

Yes, many of these chores are "done" quite messily.  And not the way I would have done them. And take a long time to complete.  But building life skills is so important!  And it's pretty cool to watch the look of determination and learning on a toddler's face as he tries to place dishes at the table, or measure something, or choose matching socks from a basket.

Creating a budget

I was at the bank the other day as part of my paycheck, budget routine and the teller made a comment about the amount I was withdrawing must mean that I budget. She continued by saying I should teach her how to budget. This took me by surprise because my assumption has always been that if you have a job working with money, you must be pretty good in dealing with it. So I thought I would write down some different ideas in how to start creating a budget.

The first thing to do is put pen to paper, even if it just writing down all the ways you spend money in one day. If your married or in a relationship this next step should be done together and continue to be a topic of discussion throughout your lives together. If your single you get to be your own designer.

Step 2, talk about your goals, your dreams, your priorities, what you like to buy, what you would like to buy, etc. Lay it all out there. My husband and I have this conversation probably at least once a week. We've talked about different goals and dreams we have. One short term goal we have is to pay more to one debt we carry every month to pay off the debt quickly and not go into debt again. A long term goal we have is building our own retirement home complete with outlying guest houses.  The decisions we make today affect whether we will be able to make that dream a reality or not. Talking about these things and coming to an agreement on these things makes it easier to have a united front when it comes to the really tempting things you may want to buy today, but can't afford or don't really need.

Step 3 for an amount of time record every penny you spend. I say amount of time because you need to decide which is going to be easiest for you to organize. I do our budget monthly because paychecks come in on scheduled days, due dates of bills fall nicely within those paychecks boundaries, and our cash categories are easily divided between the paycheck days. Some people may find it easier to do this for a week if they get paid every week or by six months if that works. But you need to track every cent even if it is a cash purchase. This recording will come in handy as you start to be the director of your money instead of the actor for your money.

Step 4 write down every debt. These are debts you owe such as student loans, credit card balances, or personal debts you owe to maybe family members or friends. Make this list from the smallest amount owed to the largest amount owed. Also take note of monthly payments and interest rates. 

Step 5 create the budget. First write down all the bills you pay every month include your minimum payments on outstanding debts. Even if you pay more towards a debt only list the minimum payment at this point. Then the money left over needs to cover all those all expenses you have been tracking for the amount of time. Categories may include food, gas, eating out, viewing movies online, etc. The list is limitless.  Here's where the belt may need to be tightened in some areas. Here is where those priorities you have laid out for yourselves helps you to set up how much you would like to spend in different categories to achieve those goals you have set for yourself. There you have it you now have a plan. You can use this plan to direct your money instead of allowing your money to direct you.

Today

Today is the kind of day when putting together a lasagna took 25 minutes and most of my brain cells.

I literally cannot remember how many times the baby woke up last night, only that he ended up in my bed at 4:30 with me curled all around him so my husband wouldn't roll over too far.

I almost started this post with "Today is the kind of Monday..." It's Tuesday.

The toddler moved like a sloth this morning when I tried to take everyone to library storytime in 15° F weather.  Even though it's his favorite thing all week.  The baby got cold, which made him wake up, and didn't take a morning nap.

That's the truth of being a mom to multiple littles.  It isn't easy.  It isn't always fun.  Sometimes it is frustrating and emotionally taxing and you feel like you're quite bad at it.

I'm going to go tickle my toddler (who is up too early from his nap, mind you) and swallow my cold coffee and find the joy in being home with my kids.  There is always some to be found.  Usually in a giggle or a shared spitty cracker or a silly face or a new word.

Wishing you a joyful today, even if it's a hard one.

Gifts and Souvenirs for Minimalist Moms

... or people about whom you say, "They're hard to buy for!"

One word.  UPGRADE.

This has been my shopping philosophy for myself, anyway, since going all KonMari on my household.  Consider replacing something the recipient already has, but getting them a fancier/better quality item. This can be a little tricky if you don't know them well (it could come off as judgy) so be careful that what you're replacing is not an heirloom or favorite old battered item.

Examples?  Better oven mitts.  The kind that fit on either hand.

Fancy hand soap or hand cream

A high-quality spill-proof Thermos-like coffee cup

Longer charging cord for laptop, cell phone, etc.

A really lovely pan, or dutch oven

High quality knives

Two words. USEFUL SOUVENIRS

No, a keychain is not really useful.  It is clutter.  It might look cool, and the recipient might actually put it on his/her keys, but it is clutter non-the-less.

Examples?  Kitchenwares.  I have received and loved potholders from Hawaii, and a rolling pin from Disney World.

Clothing items, IF you know the recipient's style well enough.  (Chances are if they're a minimalist, they have a carefully cultivated wardrobe.  Perhaps loungewear pieces.)

Food items from that locale (fruit or coconut products from tropical vacations, sourdough from San Francisco, cherry preserves from Wisconsin, apple butter from Vermont...)

Three words: STUFF TO EAT

I love food gifts!  Trying to live simply also generally involves a budget (and you know we love a budget here on MCM!) so I don't usually splurge on "fancy" food items.  Homemade foods are often wonderful, as well.

Examples I have actually received:

Home-canned pickles

Local honey

Artisan bread

Jams/preserves

A ham

Good quality wine or spirits

"Fancy" soda

Welcome!

To our readers from Poland!

My family (generations back) was from Poland.  It's lovely to have you!

Edit: Also Mexico, Canada, and Romania!

  Feel free to leave a comment telling us about yourselves, or how you discovered our blog!

How To: develop a daily schedule

I've known that I need a daily schedule since long before I became a stay-at-home mom. When I was teaching full time, I would create a daily schedule during summer break (including silly things like when we would walk the dog and when we would eat lunch.) I don't function well without some kind of schedule. I don't think that's born from teaching, even though that is a very scheduled day.I think its from my need to see things written down and my attention/focus problems.  I need to know where I'm headed in the day to avoid falling into distraction/laziness. 

So I knew I needed a schedule, but I didn't know how to go about creating one. I watched some of my favorite YouTubers and read some of my favorite blogs - they all had a schedule, and I could see their schedule, and it was kind of helpful to see an example, but nobody really talked about how they came to that schedule.  They would say things like, "This is what works for my family," but where sis "this" come from?

(For a video about the actual schedule itself, visit my YouTube channel - click here!)

Let me save you the confusion.

First, start with your personal rhythms.   Observe yourself and/or your children for a week or so and see what your natural timetable seems to be.  When does everybody seem to wake up?  Get hungry?  Need a nap? That's what you're going to build your schedule around - the most predictable things in your day. (Meaning they need to be.  Children and adults benefit from routine sleep and food!)

Write these down.  Then notice the spaces in between.  Fill those with housework or "me time" or play time or work-from-home time.  Consider how you function best - do you need to power through work in the morning?  Need some alone time in the evening?  Often need to make phone calls during business hours?  Piece things in as works best for you.  If you have small kids, remember to put in some one-on-one time whenever possible.

Consider getting up earlier.  I feel there are two kinds of morning moms - those who are woken up by their children, and those who intentionally wake up beforehand.  Waking up before your kids enables you to get ready for the day (read: actually shower) without having to set your kids in front of the TV.

Consider eating as a family.  I see lots of schedules out here in the blogosphere that have two dinnertimes - an earlier one for kids and then an after-bedtime dinner for the parents.  That takes up twice as much time in your evening, and you don't get the benefits of bonding over dinner and modeling good eating habits for your kids.

Consider getting each child up separately and putting them to nap/bed separately.  The last five minutes before a child sleeps and the first five when they awake set the tone for their sleep and their day.  Trying to go down for a nap or bedtime amidst chaos, with mom juggling other kids, is not very restful and possible feelings of jealousy or perceived lack of attention could lead to interrupted sleep, refusal to sleep,  etc.  Same goes for waking - who wants to wake up in the middle of a mess?  Help children wake up calm and ready to face the day with an organized mind by taking a few peaceful moments with each one.

(How on earth do you do that?  Well, younger children sleep more, for starters.  Older children can be gotten up, put to nap, or put to bed while younger ones are still/already sleeping.  Stagger bedtime a bit. I advocate whole-family reading time, but toothbrushing can be staggered to allow a few minutes with the finished-brushing child alone, or put on pajamas last and stagger that.)

It is certainly easiest to accomplish these things if both parents can be home in the evenings.  In the case of shift work, or single parents, choose which items are possibke for you in this stage of life.  The absolute key is a predictable structure, whatever that has to look like for you right now.

How To: shop with two kids 2 and under

Step 1: Dress both children in "leaving the house" clothes.  (Pants, mainly.)

Step 2: Buckle both children into carseats.  Pinch your finger and stick it in your mouth quickly to dull the pain and cork up the curse words.  Today might be the day your 2-year-old decides to talk in public.

Step 3: Drive to the store, using skills from AP Geometry to choose a parking spot closest to both the door and a cart corral.  

Step 4: Get both kids out.  Realize this store's carts are not compatible with your carseat. 

Step 5: Begin praying that the 2-year-old will walk calmly through the store and not break anything.

Step 6: Shop.  Interrupt shopping to feed baby, even though you did that right before you left the house.  Avoid eye contact with the older lady who looks totally weirded out that you're nursing in the aisle.

Step 7: Finish shopping.  Take cart full of clothes and children to fitting room, intentionally breaking the "no carts in fitting room" rule.

Step 8: Try on clothes.  Interrupt trying on to feed baby again.  Giggle with toddler about how funny nudity is.

Step 9: Check out.  Toddler is upset that naked time is over, and insists on being carried.  Baby is convinced he is still hungry, and starts wailing from the cart.  Hold toddler in one arm, jiggle cart with one foot, and use some remaining appendage to swipe credit card.

Step 10: Buckle kids back into carseats, drive home, get kids into the house (still crying and carrying on).

Bonus Step: Invent witty response to the inevitable question, "How was your day?"